My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong As Expected

Page 61

The atmosphere around us had clearly changed.

In a space where pastels and vibrant colors intertwine, filled with the scents of flowers and soap, we arrived at the girls' goods section.

This place is filled with clothes, accessories, socks, kitchenware, and of course, fashionable lingerie. For me, this alternate dimension is simply unbearable to stay in for even a second.

"It should be around here."

Yukinoshita said casually, but I was already exhausted beyond recognition.

"Yeah, to be able to get lost four times... your sense of geometry must be terrible."

"The only thing I don't want to hear is you criticizing my math..."

"Private universities' humanities departments don't consider math scores, so I gave up on it from the start, even if I ranked at the bottom."

"Ranked at the bottom... what score did you get?"

"Nine points, I heard that's the worst score. This is information I obtained myself."

"...Won't that cause me to repeat a grade?"

I was required by the teacher to attend extra classes before taking a make-up exam, but the make-up exam used questions directly from the extra class notes, so memorizing them would earn me points. Actually, from the teacher's perspective, making students repeat a grade is also a very troublesome matter, so for the days outside of attendance, expedient measures are almost always taken.

"So, what should we buy?"

"Hmm...something that's practical and durable enough for long-term use."

"So it's office or stationery supplies?"

These things don't seem like gifts for a young girl at all.

"I've thought about those things too."

"You actually thought about that..."

"However, I think Yuihama might not like... she probably wouldn't be happy to receive something like a pen or tool bag as a gift."

"...A wise judgment."

I can't imagine Yui excitedly exclaiming, "Wow! I've always wanted this screwdriver set! And a hex wrench too! Oh my god! Even a crowbar! Thank you so much, Yukino!" But I have a feeling that engineering-themed girls will become a trend.

"So you want to choose a gift that suits her taste?"

"Yes, I hope she'll accept it happily."

Yukinoshita smiled gently as she spoke. I think Yuihama Hikaru would be very happy to see that smile.

"Then let's hurry up and go pick one."

"Wait, what about Komachi?"

Oh, right, she hasn't contacted us yet. Without her, we'd be missing someone to offer expert advice. Although she's helped filter out the types of gifts Yui-hama likes, we still don't dare to buy anything without knowing exactly what to choose. I don't know if I should ask Komachi for help to that extent, but the thought of Yukino including pens and tool bags in her list of birthday gift options for high school girls makes me uneasy.

I took out my phone, but there was still no record of Komachi calling, so I dialed again.

After the call connected, that familiar music played again from the receiver. So why was her phone singing?

Hey~~

"Oh, where are you now? We're already waiting for you at our destination, come quickly."

"Eh... Ah~~ Komachi saw so many things she wanted to buy, but she completely forgot about them."

"How could your brain have degenerated to this extent... Your brother is really scared."

I never imagined her memory was so bad; no wonder she always messed up the tests for subjects that required memorization.

At that moment, I heard Komachi sigh with obvious disdain for me through the receiver.

"Sigh, I guess there's nothing I can do but ask my brother to think clearly... Oh well, it'll probably take another five hours for Komachi to get back here, so good luck to you both, brother and Yukino-neechan~"

"Hey, wait a minute!"

"What's wrong? Are you nervous being alone with Yukino-neechan? Don't worry, it's okay... I should be fine."

"That's secondary. Won't you get into trouble by yourself? A middle school student wandering around in a place alone..."

On holidays, shopping malls are packed with people, increasing the chances of accidents, especially since Komachi is only a middle school girl. Although her words, actions, and disdain for her brother often make me grit my teeth in anger, as her brother, I ultimately love my sister and naturally worry about her.

"Sigh, if only my brother could show that kind of care to other people... then I wouldn't have to worry about Komachi."

"It's because it's you that I'm worried."

She will readily take the bait if she feels someone is using snacks or cash as bait.

"Who does your brother think Komachi is? Komachi is your sister!"

Wow! That's really touching!

"So Komachi is perfectly fine on her own—she's actually more energetic when she's alone!"

This reason is truly pathetic.

However, I really can't argue with the fact that I'm more energetic when I'm playing alone. Think about it, when you're playing video games, aren't you super excited and shout things like "Oh my god, what move is that?", "Oh, is it coming?", "Rinko, I love you!" When your mom hears the noise, she'll ask, "Are any friends coming over?" and you'll have to quickly answer, "I...I'm on the phone," and from then on, you won't dare to play LOVE PLUS at home.

"I understand... If anything happens, remember to contact me immediately. No! Even if nothing happens, you still need to contact me."

"Okay, okay~ Komachi's hanging up now. Good luck, brother~"

The call ended there, leaving only the beeping of the machine in the receiver.

Why do I need to fill up the gas tank when I'm just buying something?

I put my phone away and looked at Yukinoshita.

"It seems like Komachi wants to buy something, so she's leaving everything else to us."

"I see... But I've already troubled her to come out on the weekend, so I'm too embarrassed to say anything more."

Yukino said regretfully, then rallied her spirits.

"Now that we know what type of girl Yuihama might like, let's figure out a way to deal with it."

Oh my god, this is really worrying.

Ignoring my unease, she went straight into a nearby clothing store and carefully compared each item.

I followed her into the store.

However, I still find it hard to stand this kind of place.

First, when a man enters the store, he has to endure the stares of other female customers, stares that seem to regard him as if he were an insect. Second, the staff also begin to move quickly, forming a defensive formation specifically designed for me, to monitor my every move.

Why? There were clearly other guys in the store! Is this discrimination? It definitely is discrimination! But those guys really did look like real-life types. Despite the temperature inside the store not being low, they were still wearing scarves around their necks and vests that looked like hunter outfits; their appearance alone exuded realism. Speaking of which, what were those weird ropes stuck to their trousers for? What were they for?

"Excuse me, sir... what would you like to do for me?"

The female shop assistant forced a smile to hide her wariness and asked me this question.

"Uh, no... I'm sorry."

I blurted out an apology to her. This unprovoked apology only heightened her suspicion, especially now that another female employee was nearby. Oh no, she's calling for her accomplice! Our entire operation is now on the verge of collapse!

If this continued, they might bring even more people. Just as I was about to flee the scene, a hand reached out to save me.

"Hachiman... what are you doing? Trying it on? Please do that at home."

"I wouldn't do it at home either! And I didn't do anything at all..."

Yukinoshita approached me with a look of disdain, and the surrounding shop assistants immediately lowered their guard.

As expected of someone who's an expert at dispersing crowds under the snow.

"Oh, are you here with your girlfriend? Please take your time choosing."

The shop assistant reached a satisfactory conclusion, left with those words, and prepared to depart.

"No, that's not true at all..."

"Isn't that right? That person is definitely suspicious..."

Her once blue eyes turned a hostile red. I chose the wrong option! If things continue like this, I'm destined for a bad end, being reported.

"Sigh... Let's go, Hachiman."

Yukinoshita pulled me away from the ever-growing crowd of shop assistants. Just by doing that, the shop assistants stopped coming near.

Once outside the store, the security was finally lifted.

"...Do I really look that suspicious?"

Right now, I'm scrunched up in a grimace, and those dead fish eyes are definitely millions of times worse than usual. In English, it's called "MEGA dead fish eyes."

Even Yukinoshita felt sympathy for me and did not blame me for my suspicious behavior at all.

"It seems that solo male guests are easily suspected. After all, all the men we see here are with their girlfriends."

I see. So this area, like the photo booth, is exclusively for women and couples. In that case, there's nothing I can do to help here. Besides, I don't have the courage to try asking around at the next shop.

"...Otherwise, I'll wait for you there."

I pointed to a bench a little further away.

Even outside the store, surrounded by female customers, it's not hard to imagine that I would be stared at with strange looks while sitting there. After all, I get strange looks even when I'm in the classroom.

However, I'm sitting on a bench further away, so at least I won't be reported, as long as I don't do anything suspicious... I guess there shouldn't be any problem, right? Anyway, I just need to be mentally prepared.

As I walked toward the bench, I thought to myself that.

"Wait a moment."

"Um?"

I turned my head and saw Yukinoshita striding towards me.

"You want me to pick out a gift based on my feelings? Not to brag, but my standards of value are beyond those of the average high school girl."

"You're really self-aware..."

After all, she was the first girl who thought of giving a tool kit as a gift.

"So... I hope you can help me..."

Snow lowered her head in embarrassment, her gaze lingering on her feet.

But asking me for help will only make things worse. Let me make this clear first: I've never bought a decent gift for a girl. I do have experience giving myself away as a gift, only to be met with a torrent of abuse.

"I really want to help you, but I can't get into those stores..."

Upon hearing my answer, Yukino sighed in despair.

"There's nothing I can do now, so please don't stray too far from me."

"What?"

I looked surprised, and Yukinoshita seemed a little displeased.

"Do I really have to explain this clearly? If breathing in and out is all you can do, even the air conditioner above your head is more useful than you."

That's absolutely true. Air conditioners are incredibly useful for purifying the air and saving electricity, and we look forward to them adding the function of "reading the air" (Note 29: Japanese "空气を读む" means "reading the air" or "reading the situation").

"In short, for the rest of today, I'll allow you to act like my boyfriend."

"Who do you think you are?"

Ugh... this is really uncomfortable...

Yukino noticed my displeasure and glared at me, saying:

What are your complaints?

"I have no complaints."

"Yes, is it..."

My reaction stunned her for a moment, and the surprise on her face was clearly visible.

However, this is not surprising. I would definitely decline a relationship with Yukinoshita; but I don't mind if it's just a pretense.

Yukinoshita doesn't lie, so when she says today is today, it's today, down to the last second; and when she says they act like a couple, they absolutely can't be a real couple.

Therefore, I can accept her suggestion without worry.

Just as she trusts 100% to know how utterly worthless I am, I can also be 100% certain that nothing will ever happen between us. Maybe this is what they call a relationship of trust... What am I even saying? It doesn't sound peaceful at all.

Yukino noticed her stunned expression, so she turned around and spoke in another direction.

"...I thought you would definitely hate it."