Jinting Han people

Chapter 740 The Night of Reunion

The lights inside the room were dim, but the stars and moon outside the window were exceptionally bright, reflecting on the cloudless night sky over the Wujiang River, giving the sky a clear, dark purple hue. The vast Milky Way stretched across it clearly, a truly captivating sight. Meanwhile, the bamboo grove in the county seat swayed in the wind, making a remarkably hollow rustling sound, as if silently reminiscing about something.

Eight-year-old Liu Wei was understandably nervous before stepping into the room. Although he had been waiting for this day ever since he left his mother, and had been waiting for a long time, when the day finally arrived and he could see his biological father, Liu Wei felt no joy at the realization of his wish, but rather mostly anxiety.

The reason is simple: he has heard far too many people mention his father's name. These people come from different backgrounds and have different attitudes—some are deeply in love with him, some look up to him with awe, some revere him like a god, and some hate him with a vengeance. But regardless, everyone regards Liu Xian as a figure capable of stirring up storms, as if a single thought of his could move mountains and fill seas.

This led Liu Wei to also regard his father as a godlike figure; he might be ruthless, but he certainly possessed a terrifying and irresistible power. In fact, although he hadn't yet met his father, he could already sense this power. Even though he lived in an ordinary county town, the silence within, the imposing presence of the surrounding soldiers, and the oppressive atmosphere permeating the air far exceeded his impressions of Xuchang.

It's important to understand that Xuchang was a vast and prosperous city, one of the five capitals of Cao Wei, far surpassing the small town of Wujiang. He also spent his days and nights with his mother in the deep palace, a high and dark palace where even with lanterns lit by the palace servants, it was difficult to illuminate the beams. Yet there was no majesty there, only countless chaos, confusion, and collapse, which he still remembers to this day.

Now, in this small courtyard of the county government building, the lights were dim, the shadows of the trees were sparse, and the moonlight accompanied the faint darkness. He couldn't help but glance at his own shadow, then sketched his father's image in his mind, and imagined the various attitudes his father might have towards him. He was so engrossed in this thought that he didn't notice Meng He and Li Xiu's conversation.

When Li Xiu came out again and let him go in alone, Liu Wei suddenly realized what was happening. At that moment, he couldn't explain his thoughts; everything seemed to be over, and he felt only a sense of relief and liberation.

Liu Wei pushed open the door, walked in, and then closed it again. Turning around, his eyes caught sight of his father. At first glance, he had to admit that his father was an exceptionally charismatic man. Although his face bore indelible scars from knives and swords, they didn't add to his menacing air; instead, they exuded a weathered charm that made his smile seem even more profound. Time had left its mark on his face; fine lines etched themselves around his eyes, but his dark eyes, clear and deep, seemed to illuminate anyone who looked into them.

Liu Xian sat back down at his seat. He looked at his second son, whom he had never met before, with a heavy yet joyful feeling. Many forgotten memories came to mind. He beckoned to Liu Wei and said, "Come here, get closer, let me take a look."

So Liu Wei moved closer, trying to straighten his posture so as not to appear timid in front of his father. His face was indeed very similar to Liu Xian's when he was young. Although there were some subtle differences in his eyebrows and eyes, the somber and melancholic temperament was almost identical. If there was any difference, it was that Liu Wei had a stronger air of nobility, making him more aloof than Liu Xian had been in his youth.

Liu Xian gazed into his son's eyes, while Liu Wei defiantly raised his head to meet his gaze. Liu Xian sensed a complex mix of emotions in their eyes. But soon, a feeling of blood ties welled up between them. Liu Xian sighed, took Liu Wei's hand, and asked, "What's your name?"

"My name is Liu Wei." Liu Wei thought for a moment and then said, "My mother also calls me Bai Zhou."

Liu Xian immediately understood the true meaning behind Yang Xianrong's name. There are two poems in the Book of Poetry, one from the "Bei Feng" and the other from the "Yong Feng". Considering the character "Wei" in Liu Wei's name, it can be known that the original meaning must have come from the line "Floating on that cypress boat, in that middle of the river. Her hair is disheveled, truly my beauty". This is a poem of sorrow for unrequited love, which made Liu Xian feel very sad.

But she has passed away, and all he can do now is to teach this child well.

"Alright, Bai Zhou." Seeing Liu Wei nod, Liu Xian sighed and said, "Your personality is really like your mother's. I'm sorry to both of you."

Hearing this, Liu Wei's eyes stung with tears, and the grievances that had accumulated in his heart for many years surged up. He had a lot to say to his father, but before he could speak, Liu Xian's next words blocked him out: "But I will not say any more apologies, because the relationship between your mother and me is a tragic one, and I cannot make it public. If she did not know me and I did not know her, perhaps we would both be better off."

This was an unquestionable choice. Given Liu Xian's current status, if he were to have an affair with the former Empress of Jin, it would inevitably cause great controversy, something Liu Xian could not accept at the moment. But he also knew how much harm it would cause a child if his father refused to acknowledge his mother.

Sure enough, upon hearing this, Liu Wei immediately stopped. He glared fiercely at Liu Xian, his eyes filled with hatred, and he made a grinding sound as he expressed his dissatisfaction to his father.

Liu Xian knew his words were cruel, but he already knew about his second son's experiences. Liu Wei was no ordinary child. Liu Xian could not deceive him, nor could he hide the truth from him. The reason was simple. He slowly said, "You are lucky because you are my son; you are unlucky because you are also my son."

“I am the emperor, and you are the prince of the Han Dynasty, enjoying wealth and honor that others cannot. But everything comes at a price. As the price, I cannot be an ordinary father, and you cannot just indulge in pleasure. Everything else is illusory. As long as you bear the surname Liu, the people of the world will have extremely high expectations of you. No matter when or where you are, no matter what grievances you have suffered in the past, you must be a strong person.”

At this point, Liu Xian couldn't help but recall his conversation with Yang Xianrong at Hulao Pass. He then said to Liu Wei, "I once said something similar to your mother, and she told me she couldn't do it. But this was also your grandmother's dying wish to me, and I can only do it."

Liu Xian paused for a moment, then began to remove his upper body clothing, exposing his torso to the child, letting the lamplight shine on him. It was a horrifying sight; Liu Wei was stunned, even forgetting to maintain his anger. He had never imagined that a person could have so many scars, each one shocking and unforgettable.

Pointing to the scars on his body, Liu Xian introduced them to Liu Wei one by one: "This is from when I was seventeen, when someone forcibly broke my arm. That person was ten feet tall, practically a giant; this is from when I was eighteen in Xiayang, when a Xianbei man shot an arrow at me from the mountain, hitting me right between the eyebrows; this is from when I was twenty-three in Hedong, when I was infiltrating the enemy camp at night, a Xiongnu archer shot me in the left shoulder, but the injury wasn't serious; a few days later, in a bloody battle at Gumu Plain, another arrow hit me in the chest, nearly killing me..." These simple words awakened images of bloodshed and carnage in Liu Wei's mind. He wasn't unfamiliar with battlefields, and he had seen dead people, but he had never seen so many scars as his father's. This also meant that his father had experienced far more hardships than he had imagined, and that he had overcome them all.

Thinking this way, Liu Wei's hatred for his father gradually dissipated, and he had to agree with his teacher Ji Shao's evaluation of his father: "The ultimate skill of the Han emperors is their will, to overcome the impossible and conquer the insurmountable. With the most steadfast will, they will continue until they succeed."

Seeing that he had successfully calmed the child, Liu Xian felt a little relieved. He put his shirt back on and said to Liu Wei earnestly again, "Bai Zhou, I'm not telling you this to complain. I'm telling you that nothing in this world is something you can get for granted. Even if I am the Emperor of Han, I can't give you everything."

At this point, Liu Xian was momentarily at a loss for words. He turned his gaze to his second son, whom he was meeting for the first time. The boy seemed to lower his head sensibly and said nothing more, but the disappointment and loneliness in his eyes could not be concealed. Instead, it made Liu Xian's heart flutter with unease.

To be honest, those words weren't what Liu Xian really wanted to say. He also felt they were cold and devoid of warmth, but suddenly, he had a child who was already so big, yet he had never even met him. Liu Xian was equally at a loss, and didn't know what to say. He was simply acting on his political instincts, trying to explain the advantages and disadvantages to him and impart some principles.

But how could a child possibly understand all of this? Some things cannot be conveyed through words alone.

Thinking about this, Liu Xian suddenly felt a pang of self-reproach and enlightenment: 道理 (principles/truths) are always the cheapest thing, for a simple reason: thinking and doing are two completely different things. Just like that night, he clearly knew he was making a mistake, yet he couldn't refuse Yang Xianrong. He actually quite liked Yang Xianrong, but he refused to admit it.

Compared to these cheap platitudes, love is unconditional. Therefore, even as the emperor, there were some crucial words he hadn't yet spoken to his children. If he didn't say them today, they would inevitably become a knot in their hearts later.

"What a fool I am!" Thinking this, Liu Xian suddenly understood. He cursed himself inwardly. Wasn't it obvious what promise he wanted as a child? Why be so insistent on a child? So he grasped Liu Wei's hand again, and under his second son's astonished gaze, he spoke softly yet solemnly:

"But no matter what, Baizhou, you must remember that I am your father and you are my son. From today onwards, you have a home. No matter what troubles you, you can tell me. I will never let anyone bully you again. I only want you to become a strong person, a person who will never shed tears again, a person who can make your mother proud."

At this point, Liu Xian pulled his second son into his arms, giving him a long-awaited hug. Sure enough, it wasn't long before a sob came from his chest, followed by a wail. The child's trembling saddened Liu Xian as well. He looked at the moonlight outside the window, thought of his past self, and couldn't help but shed tears.

Those years in Luoyang were painful and have vanished like bubbles in the wind, but for Liu Xian, they are an unforgettable part. The scars etched his image, but also shaped him. As someone who has been through it all, he can now look back with equanimity, regarding them as his wealth, without bitterness or elation.

But not everyone can bear it. In Sun Xiu's words, he was also a lucky man. In the midst of such fierce and bloody turmoil in the Central Plains, many people he knew, strangers, related to him, and unrelated to him were annihilated, while Liu Xian survived, which in itself was part of his good fortune. But for those who could not overcome it, this was a final farewell.

Thinking of this, thinking of those who had been by his side, Liu Xian felt a pain so intense it brought tears to his eyes. He had only lost some things; many others had remained by his side until today. But how many people in the world had lost everything, and how much pain did they carry in their hearts? This endless cycle of life and death weighed heavily on Liu Xian's heart, making him tremble.

He recalled his promise to give all people a place to belong—a promise too grand for him to fulfill in his lifetime. Even so, changing the world so that future generations would no longer face such torment and turmoil, nor need to possess the wealth that comes with such suffering, remained his mission.

Before he knew it, Liu Wei had cried himself to sleep; he was still just a child. Liu Xian asked Li Xiu to come in again and specially changed his bedding to a softer one.

Looking at his second son's gentle face, Liu Xian asked Li Xiu softly, "Shuniang, do you think I'm hypocritical?"

Li Xiu knew exactly what he was thinking. Liu Xian was probably reflecting on where he had fallen short. He appeared calm on the surface, but he always liked to put the most pressure on himself. So she cleverly replied, "Everyone in the world believes that Your Majesty can bring victory and peace to the world."

Victory may come at a heavy price, but people always crave and celebrate it, because only after victory can they desire anything else. Without victory, there is nothing. From this perspective, no one can blame Liu Xian.

Liu Xian smiled and sat back down at the table, examining the situation of both sides on the map.

Unbeknownst to him, everything in the night sky first slowly darkened, then gradually brightened again. When a loud rooster crowed, waking Liu Wei from his dream, the first thing he saw was his father. His father was sitting upright at the table with his back to him, his back as solid and tall as a mountain. (End of Chapter)